Top #7 Video Games for Old People.(old people gaming)
This article is inspired by the fact that my grandpa couldn’t even hold the computer mouse properly. He even broke his arm once, trying to navigate the mouse cursor. And since I was home-schooled since first grade, I had to find a buddy to play with.
No, seriously. I was not home-schooled, but some people are. Some people are… But it’s a true story. Can you even imagine what these boys and girls do alone at home, without a play buddy? Grandpa personally thought that was cosmic technology and I had to prove him wrong. I had to prove that was human tech, made by human hands…or was it now?
And grandma? She was often so bored that she was destructive! I had to find her a new occupation during her free time. Both my grandparents are retirees, so you can imagine. My parents were all day working, so yeah. I also had my own agenda to get grandpa and grandma to support me so my parents could regularly buy me new and cool tech. They were old-fashioned.
Grandpa was a mailman in the USPS postal services. Grandma was for so many years a clerk in an old Pennsylvania clothing factory. They had old calculating machines and other mechanical goodies back in their time. But now since times are drastically changing, you adapt or die.
And to be honest, I wanted to brag in front of my school buddies, that my grandpa played CS:GO, Battlefield 3 and FIFA. I taught him all. I did it. He did it. Now I finished school a while ago, and I’m doing my own thing now, business and college, but still we play from time to time, still. The old days I miss…so much.
Yes, you can teach old people to play. They’re not retarded. Never forget that it’s their final days, their “final countdown”, and the only thing we can do right now, is be with them, support them, and make their humble boring life their last adventure. And greatest time in their lives that they’ll never forget.
MY PERSONAL TOP #7 GAMES TO PLAY IS THIS:
Battlefield 3 for PC: Super intense game. I can play that for ages! All day, all night, bebee! I purchased the game immediately after went out on the shelves, and I’ve playing it since day one! Price now is pretty cheap too, like pennies! This game will be suited for men, means grandpaps! It’s a boys’ game, not girls’ game. I tried convincing my GF to try it out, but she nearly knocked off my PC to the ground! From panic and from fear. So, a game for big boys. Vietnam vets will absolutely love the game. Or retired soldiers, policemen, firefighters, or just mailmen, lel. Who said mailmen can’t play games and have fun!? You racist! How dare you!
Battlefield 1 for PC: Same as above. Absolutely stunning game, pure graphics experience, hard-core action, murders, shooting Nazis with tanks, dropping bombs on houses from the first planes introduced in anyone’s Air Force, and the battlegrounds are just so intense, and so beautiful. France, Belgium, whatever. The game is stunning. Great multi too. You can play with your paps and you can murder enemies together. Nothing better than some good ol’ family multi. And if your granpaps was in the Army or he was a Marine, he’d know all these old weapons in the game! No worries!
FIFA 18 for PS4: Let’s now jump to…yeah. Soccer was introduced to the States in the 90’s but quickly it became popular. So popular. Now everyone knows about Messi and who Cristiano Ronaldo is. David Beckham, your grandma knows him! Cheeky cheeky! Now FIFA is a game for both genders. A great wait to have some fun with friends, die laughing, vlog, make money off of it, bet money, gamble. No, did I just told you to gamble and bet money on your grandma or your grandpaps? No, you don’t do that! Only do that if the bets are more than 5:1, yaaahhh boooiiiii. Anyways, the latest FIFA games are so easy to play. Difficult with a keyboard, but easy with a joystick. Your elderly folks will need a few weeks, maybe a few months to get used to the combinations and keys, but after constant training, they’ll murder even you! And it’s a great way to help them relax. Your grandpa was probably a die-hard NFL fan, or he supported the Yankees! But he knows these sports to the backbone. Help him explore new areas of life and he or she will thank you in the afterlife! Do you remember the moment you got your first toy soldier, your first cellphone, and smartphone. Your first love. Your first kiss. That are the moments we remember! That are the moments we cherish so much! New can’t bed bad, man.
CS:GO (Counter-Strike GO) for PC: Who doesn’t know this freaking game!? It is so cool. I can play this for hours too. But it could be more unforgiving to new people. It’s on your tongue. Just say it. Just…say it please. I won’t be mad. I promise! YES. I wanted to call my grandpa a NOOB. A freaking noob. But I was a noob once too. Nothing shameful about that. Being a noob is a temporary state of your mind, your current poor elevation in the game, and your lack of any hand to eye coordination, or any coordination at all. You can launch bots and you and paps can murder some Artificial Intelligence. Specify low sensitivity of the mouse because noobs jump, let’s be honest. He’ll jump around and get scared a lot. Especially the headshots. Noobs are scared of the head-whooooooooops. Whoooooop. CS:GO can be a lot of fun especially when drunk. It’s not that serious game and a party can happen at any time! Bring the Vodka, ladies! “Grandma, no, that was just the expression. No, I don’t know any girls. Please, no, please, don’t take grandpa’s Sony PS4. Please grandma… No, he didn’t. I… It was me.”
PlayerUnknown’s Battlegrounds for PC: The best way for grandma to get her revenge and wipe out grandpa’s smile off his face. Or maybe someone else will be the last one to laugh. A game where only one player stays alive in the end. It’s a game similar to the Russian S.T.A.L.K.E.R. game, with a huge open world, where you roam the dusty farm roads and empty houses and gather endless piles of supplies. Here you must kill enemy players, everyone’s on its own, and the map gets smaller and smaller every few minutes. Eventually, your grandparents will see each other face to face, and that can’t be more fun! Weapons are insane. It’s a shooter game, but can be switched to a 3rd too (3rd person play / 3rd person view). Grandpaps can grenade your grandma too. Throw in a few metal pumpkins for the fun. Blow her @#$%&! with some bullets and grenades.
Call of Duty: WWII for PC: Again, best suited for men, for vets, and the single player mode of Call of Duty is always excruciating! You can’t just miss that. Give your grandpa some time to kick the AI’s @#$%&!. Don’t get me wrong. The multiplayer is pretty insane in Call of Duty too! But the kids are just more there. Maybe old people and mature people in general won’t like it that much. But maybe they still have the young spirit in them and want to play with some spoiled little brats. It’s really a personal preference.
Need for Speed (NFS) for PS4: Personally my favorite. I’m a car maniac. I love cars. Staying under cars. Drifting, drag racing them, showing off, and I absolutely love loud exhausts! Magnaflows, Cherry Bombs, all day long, baby! And let’s be honest here. Who doesn’t? And this is a game that your grandma will love too. Women by nature love to compare themselves to men, and try and “fight” them, try and win and show off, show they’re better. Well, I guess we’ll see. The cars are sick. From old to new. From American muscle, to Imports and JDM, to European boosted sick rides and Beemers. Ferraris. Lambos. Sick. Again, like the FIFA sports game, you only need a joystick. Far more easy to work with, not like the PC thing. And you can relax on your couch too. It’s not that tiring to just lie back and lazy-play and kick your opponent’s bottom parts.
I recommend you first start small. Introduce them to the cars’ world. PS4 is easy to work with for just about anyone. I’ve personally seen 7-year olds play like Pros, so just make your own conclusions if a 70 or 80-years old man or woman can learn. Of course they can! They’re not retarded. Just give them a chance. Old people usually refuse to play any games because they’re too afraid of rejection! They don’t want other people to make fun of them. So just be patient and repeat, repeat, repeat. Practice makes perfect.
Then you can move to shooter games, which are the most interesting thing that happened in the 21st century! Start with bots, launch them on “Easy”, and start the fun games. You can drink with grandpaps or grandma, so they can relax a bit. Have fun. Don’t take life too seriously. And don’t underestimate old people. Most of the times they want to play so much! But are just afraid. They want…
Because their life hasn’t ended yet. It’s only over when it’s over!
Vlog everything. Film it. Have the memories of your life. Even if they suck at it, it’d still be fun.
Over and out.